Three deep breaths, huh?! {/ryan}

[fidel]

It was all Fidel could do not to snap the screen clean off of his laptop. "I outta.." he hissed an unfinished threat. A message appeared from Ryan, asking if he would like to come to his room. Presumably to "talk it out". Fidel consented.

Why?

The shifter stood up so quickly that his chair tip over backwards and fell to the floor. Fidel logged off. "What do they know?! They don't know anything!" The way they had treated him, the way those two talked... as though he was just being irrational. A stupid teenage boy. Ryan! He thought he was so clever. And that, Ari. If he hadn't have butted in perhaps it wouldn't have been such an issue. It peeved him. Badly. He wasn't some stupid kid who was just having hormonal emotions.. so why were they treating him like one? And further, why in the hell did he agree to go see Ryan anyway? Perhaps he wanted to prove a point. That point.That no matter how much talking went on or no matter how many... jedi mind tricks (or whatever those counselor types did) it wouldn't solve this problem.

What problem? Fidel knew the answer.. but he wouldn't allow himself to think it. Much less say it out loud.

Fidel realize that he was tugging on his right ear rather forcefully. The same ear that had been mangled on his first night of shifting and remained as such. It looked a bit like an ear piercing gone terribly wrong, which was, more or less, true. As a feral raccoon he had accidentally wandered into a trap that had been set up, had his ear tagged then was released. In his terrified state, he ripped the tag right out leaving permanent scarring in both his shifted and human form.

The tugging left a kind of burning sensation. Fidel snatched his hat off of his nightstand. In a few log strides, Fidel crossed the threshold of the room's bathroom. He dropped his hat on the lid of the toilet and spun on his heel to grab the edges of the sink. As his grip tightened, his knuckles turned white and his arms began to shake with the pressure he was putting on the porcelain appliance. He stared down at the little silver stopper, grinding his teeth attempting to rein in his anger. "What do they know!" His voice was low and dangerous sounding "Some stupid thief?" It was somewhat of a paradox. The idea that they might be labeling and stereotyping him as "just a bad apple" infuriated him, but the thing was, he thought that he wanted to have that bad boy image. That way people would leave him alone.. but did he really want to be left alone?

The boy looked up, right into his own eyes. The mirror in front of him copied and reflected every inch of his anger. Fidel was shocked by the ferocity in the face and momentarily forgot it was him. His left hand formed a fist and drew back ready to fly at the face the was quickly melting into a look of shock. His raccoon spirit seemed to drop his arm for him whispering into his mind "It's just not worth it". Fidel leaned forward an studied his own expression. What was anger was now brooding. Knit eyebrows, the corners of his mouth tugging downwards, and... what was that. Fidel reached up and touched his cheek, bringing the tear to eye level. It's soft and delicate curve reflected light back at him. Was he crying?

With a snort, Fidel broke the magic and roughly shook the little tear away. He bent to pick up his hat and fitted it over his head, particularly over his ruined ear. Resting his hand on the doorknob, he took a final look over the room, that would have been quite tidy, if his side wasn't so disheveled. Even the chair was still laying on it's back. Fidel didn't care, after all it's not like Jayden was going to be there to scold him. That one thought made the raccoon feel very, very small. Nobody was there to scold him.

He exited his room hastily, tugging the brim of his hat down over his eyes. He slipped the key into his pocket and folded his arms tightly. He just didn't want to see, hear, or talk to anyone before he reached Ryan's room. He scanned the number plates before finding Ryan's room and knocking on the door.

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word count: 785
tagg'd: Ryan
outfit: (coming soon)
notes: Finally...
playlist: Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri• Stop Crying your Heart Out by Oasis• In Memorium In Advance by From First to Last

[ryan]

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Ryan was no logged on the school’s chat. He was talking to a couple people. One in particular was Fidel. Ryan and everyone else picked up that he was upset. Ryan wanted to help him feel better but talking to him seemed to only make him mad. He didn’t know much about this man much less anyone at this school. He did hope that would change. Fidel was getting even more upset by the minute. Ryan really felt like this guy needed to talk. But he didn’t want to do it online so Ryan suggested that he come to his room. The German boy knew very well that talking some sense into the boy would probably make matters worse. But to him it really seemed like Fidel pitied himself which was one thing Ryan was going to state sometime in their very near future talk. Fidel had said he was on his way; Ryan himself felt something in his stomach. Was he nervous? Was he really regretting telling Fidel to come over? In their past conversion (not really a conversion, he was merely stating what he thought) they had seemed to get along fine; was this talk going to ruin that? Or would a friendship come out of it?


Whatever the after math was; he had to go through the storm first. His part of the room you could say was very feminine. But that just expressed who he was. He was a sweet teenage boy, who loved fluffy stuff animals and real fluffy animals. Who also loved playing the guitar and bass; for both had their own stand at the foot of his bed with his amp in-between them. Of course all his stuff animals were scattered on his bed. All the stuff you see in his room he didn’t pick out himself. His stuff animals his brother and sister picked out and gave him. For everything else his brother picked out; with help from his father from picking out the guitars and amp. He had actually asked his brother to pick out build a bears for his friends. A pink bear for Mel, he seemed to like pink. Any kind of cat for Dymetri, as long as it’s cute. A bunny one for Sieffre; seeing how he turns into a hare; thanks to his brother really for him knowing what a hare is, really. But still his brother knows and he trusted his brother more than anything. Hina’s gift will something really, really cute; for a thirteen year old girl. This was another thing he really didn’t know what to get her. He hoped whatever his brother got she would love. Also Choi will get a panda bear because he shifted into one. Last but serenely not least id Fidel, he was still thinking about getting him one. He guessed after their conversation he would have his answer. If yes than he had no idea what he build a bear he would him, and even if he would like one. Maybe with this one he would ask Fidel himself.

But not to worry he will figure it out sooner or later. Thinking about Christmas gifts he remembered that he was going to be enjoying Christmas with two of his friends; Hina and Dymetri. Maybe he should invite Fidel… But he wasn’t sure how that would go down either. He wasn’t sure if Hina would be comfortable with so many people and none of them being girls. Which also reminded him that he needed to practice playing Christmas songs; he knew many of them on both the guitar and piano. But he always told himself it never hurt him to practice. But he still had a couple days to go he was fine. Although he never liked putting things off; because he tends to forget about it. But it wouldn’t help with him starting now and with Fidel going to knock on his door any second now. He didn’t even think about this for two more seconds when he heard a knock on his door. He was glad he was here alone because talking to Fidel might be hard to do with two other people speaking up when they didn’t have anything to do this. Ryan thought for two second which would be better; him getting up and answering the door or just telling Fidel to come in. He knew it was Fidel for the knock was particularly hard; so if this was Fidel he was pretty mad.

Ryan blinked; but if this wasn’t Fidel than who would be this upset with him? On another hand why was Fidel upset himself? If Ryan said anything to him that was offensive to him he certainly didn’t mean to. Maybe he should just let Fidel come in by himself. “The door is open; you can come in” Answered Ryan to the knock after a couple seconds after he knocked. Of course he had the German accent but he doubted Fidel would be able to hear it behind the door. German accents weren’t very out there as opposed to Spanish or any other accent that he has heard. Ryan braised himself for the yelling he knew he was going to hear. But he would wish that he wouldn’t yell; for he did have sensitive hearing. But he stayed where he was at. Which was on sitting on his chair that was a foot away from the foot of his bed (If that made sense) with his laptop on his lap of course; but the screen was down and it was shut off. For he didn’t want to be distracted away from Fidel. Ivy; Ryan’s Golden retriever was lying near his feet and next to the chair. Her ears perked up when the door knock and she tilted her head to the side a bit out of curiosity. She was waiting for it to open so she could see who it was and if this person was going to hurt her owner. “ Ivy entspannen, er ist ein Freund.“ He told his dog; in his native language for this was the only language the dog understood.



this is you thinking !

" this is you speaking ! "

" this is someone else speaking ! "

words1,026 tagged Contrast
notes See what his makeup looks like with the picture at the top of my post the left one.
See my avatar for his hair. outfit Here, Bed and everything else
template PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION[/center]

Translation: entspannen, er ist ein Freund = Relax he is a friend.

[fidel]

Fidel waited a few seconds, then knocked again. He pressed his ear against the wood of the door and listened. He heard a few words in some odd sort of language, but couldn't understand for the life of him what the person inside the room was saying. He couldn't be sure if it was Ryan... but what would it hurt?

He put his hand on the doorknob and pushed the door open, leading with his shoulder. It was also somewhat of a habit, that way if something jumped out at him it would get his shoulder instead of something more important, like, say, his face. He poked his head into the room, pushing up the brim of his hat so as to properly look around the room. It was a bit brighter than the hallway of his own dimly lit room, so he had to squint a bit. His eyes fell on the boy, sitting on a bed with what appeared to be, stuffed animals here and there. Fidel made a face that expressed confusion, but quickly changed it fearing Ryan had seen.

"Oh right.." He said aloud, remembering that Ryan was blind. He stepped over the threshold and cleared his throat. "You're Ryan aren't you? Fidel Scott Mantagra." For some reason he liked the was his full name sounded.

He took a few tentative steps towards the bed. And stopped. C'mon Fidel, Chill. What can this kid you to you anyway? The raccoon shift didn't realize how tense he was, as though he were gearing up for a confrontation. Like a rubber band slowly being stretched. He chewed his lip as he approached. "Uh.. where do you want me?" He shook his head, "Where do you want me to sit I mean." Way to make it awkward, Fidy boy.

Fidel walked around the side of the bed and then, he saw the dog. "Dog!" He said, rather loudly and in a frightened voice. He backpedaled and ran into a nearby dresser. It's corner caught him under the rib and he toppled over. He lay in shock for few seconds before doubling over and moaning. "Ow... sh*t.."

The shifter had a problem with dogs. No matter where he went they always were an issue for him. He had learned to fear dogs ever since he learned he was a shifter. As a raccoon, a guard dog could pick him up in it's mouth, shake a few times, and Fidel would be dogmeat... literally. That was the issue, Guard dogs. Also, the shady people around his childhood streets would waltz around with their fighting dogs that could rip a man to bits. Big dogs scared him. Even though this dog was a Golden retriever, it still gave him a pretty bad start. With a groan, Fidel stumbled to his feet. "I.. hate.. dogs." He whispered between gasps.

Keeping his hand pressed against his side he made his way back to the bed, eying the dog warily. "S-sorry. Where do you want me again?"

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word count: 548
tagg'd: Ryan
outfit: (coming soon)
notes: Sorry, Con's been lazy... and.. haha! Fidel, you silly person
playlist: Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri• Stop Crying your Heart Out by Oasis• In Memorium In Advance by From First to Last

[ryan]

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Ryan walked over to his bed while he waited for the person at the door to come in. Of course he has gotten used to where everything in his room was. So he didn’t need anyone’s help trying to find something in his dorm. He of course would be very pissed if someone moved anything in the dorm; whether it was his or theirs. He was kind of OCD with that. He couldn’t have anything move and if it was moved it would have to be put back where it was in the first place. He guessed this was because he was blinded; but he or anyone else would never really know. Ryan flopped on his bed and closed his eyes. He was on his back and if he could see he would be looking at the ceiling if his eyes were open. He placed his hands under his head; his head was toward the foot of his bed; while his feet rested on his pillows. Ryan knew in the back of his mind he wouldn’t be staying like this for long. Though if you were to ask him if he was comfortable; he would say no; he’s never really comfortable lying on his back. So if you saw him lying down it would be on his stomach or his side mostly.


He heard the person at the door come in. Ryan opened his eyes and moved his head to the door. No he could not see it but he heard a noise come from that direction so he moved his head in that direction. He stared straight ahead of him like he always did; there were times where he would move his eyes. He waited for some kind of introduction or something. Maybe him just talking; that’s how he distinguished people was their voice. But if this was Fidel than he wouldn’t know he would have to introduce himself and hope that he was telling the truth. But that was one reason how Ryan easily trusted people; for he trusted people when they first meet him, what they say to him and so on. He had to trust people a lot of the time when it came to a lot of things. He could very well be talking to a person who wanted to kill him and this person wouldn’t be Fidel at all. But even though he had pride issues; he almost trusted everyone. Ryan had heard the words ‘oh right’ from the person but didn’t know who it was for he never heard the voice before. Then came the introduction; Ryan nodded though with his head still on the bed. He wondered just how he looked laying there with his head to Fidel nodding. “Yes I am Ryan, Ryan Blake Hoffman. Nice to meet you in person” Ryan said in of course his German accent. Ryan didn’t really care about his name. It was just something his parents decided to name him.

Ryan was relaxed as he always is even when someone was yelling at him he always seemed relaxed. It was only when he was having a mental break down on which his body showed you everything he felt and didn’t seem so relaxed. A lot of people he met and talked to didn’t like this about him. But he would never change for one person. Not to mention he didn’t think he could change this part of him. The way his body worked and everything. He had gotten so used not using his body to show his feelings. He also didn’t like knowing they knew what he was feeling by his body language it made him feel weird. The comforter underneath his body was very comfortable to lie on; he loved it. He was so glad his brother picked this one. "Uh.. where do you want me?"

[/b] broke through his thoughts and he remembered he did have company. That was quite rude of him to forget but Fidel didn’t have to know it. Though Ryan knew what he was talking about and didn’t need the extra explanation. Ryan sat up; crossing his legs and putting his hands on his legs; he stared in front of him. ‘Well you can sit where ever you like as long as you don’t touch me’ Ryan thought to himself; but this wasn’t something he was going to say to the other boy. “You may of course sit where ever you like. It does not matter to me” Answered Ryan.


As soon as he answered he heard Fidel say dog in a rather loud voice. Ryan flinched as he heard this; he doesn’t like loud noises. But what came next made him flinch worse. Ryan heard Fidel hit something; most likely it seemed one of his roommate’s dressers. He knew this from where the sound came from. “Are you alright? I’m sorry I didn’t know you didn’t like dogs or I would have warned you and would’ve had her hide under one of the beds” Ryan thought that having Ivy under one of the beds would be better “As a matter of fact I will have her go now” he added. He did not hesitate to command Ivy to go “"Ivy; unter Mitchell's Bett zu gehen und dort bleiben, bis ich sage, Sie können kommen"” He had no idea how Ivy would have known what he said but she did and she followed his orders and she went under Mitchell’s bed. Why did he say his roommates instead of his? Because Ryan didn’t think it would make the other boy more comfortable having her under his bed.


Ryan stayed looking in front of him and stayed how he was sitting. He scratched the back of his head; he felt the hardness the gel did to his hair. Ryan heard of course his next comment and decided not to comment on it. Because if he did it wouldn’t be very polite and would just make things worse; so in fact he swallowed his pride and forgot about what Fidel has just said. “You may sit where ever you feel comfortable” Ryan said yet again just without some stuff. Ryan thought about that answer and wondered if maybe he should tell Fidel not to touch anything. “Oh; if you don’t mind can you not move anything from where it is. You may touch whatever you feel like touching and pick things up; I do not mind that. But can you please put whatever you picked up back where you found it; like exactly where you found it. Please” He asked in the calmest and most respectful voice; with of course with his accent backing him up 100%.



this is you thinking !

" this is you speaking ! "

" this is someone else speaking ! "

[/size][/blockquote]
words1,115 taggedContrast notes It’s fine; I hope mines okay. I kind of babbled about a lot of stuff though... Sorry..outfit Here,
template PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION[/center]
Translation: Ivy; go under Mitchell’s bed and stay there till I say you can come out